Ever wanted to cry over jamón pricing or discover 37 types of yogurt in one aisle? Welcome to Tours with Delia™, your one-way ticket to the most culturally rich, emotionally charged, and olive-packed journey through Spain’s greatest treasure: Mercadona.
🎟️ Book Your Spot Now!
Limited tickets available per tour—because apparently, loitering in supermarkets with a group of strangers is frowned upon.
🛒 Available Tours
1. La Ruta de las Galletas
Duration: 45 minutes (or 2 hours if Delia’s indecisive)
We begin in the cookie aisle, where Delia leads a philosophical discussion on the existential meaning of María biscuits and the sociopolitical undertones of Hacendado branding. Includes taste test!
2. Aceituna Safari Deluxe
Duration: 30 minutes
Explore the olive section with binoculars and a deep curiosity. Are you a rellenas de anchoa kind of person? Or a black olive rebel? Delia knows. She always knows.
3. The Great Cheese Debate (feat. Queso de Cabra)
Duration: TBD, depending on emotional cheese attachment
A tour so intense we ask participants to sign a liability waiver in case of dairy-induced identity crises.
4. Express Aesthetic Tour: Things in Jars
Duration: 20 minutes, no touching allowed
An Instagrammable exploration of pickled vegetables, exotic sauces, and moral dilemmas over buying pesto for €3.85.
🔥 Bonus Micro-Pilgrimages
🍊 The Juice Machine: A Modern Miracle
Gather ‘round the fresh-squeezed orange juice machine that works… sometimes. Delia will guide you through the existential suspense of pressing the button and praying it doesn’t jam. Includes dramatic reenactment of “the juice didn’t come out but my soul did.”
🥖 50-Cent Bread: A Carb-Religious Experience
At exactly 0,50€, this bread is more than a baguette. It is salvation in crusty form. Together, we’ll line up at 9AM and engage in meditative reflection on the nature of value, softness, and crumbs in your tote bag.
💬 What People Are Saying
“She told me which tortilla is best. My life will never be the same.”
— José, reformed Carrefour loyalist
“I came for the tour and stayed for the commentary on late-stage capitalism via frozen croquetas.”
— Alicia, definitely cried in aisle 7
“We lost three people in the wine section. Worth it.”
— Tour Group C, July 2025
💸 Pricing & Tickets
| Tour | Price (EUR) | Bonus |
|---|---|---|
| La Ruta de las Galletas | 8€ | Free Hacendado biscuit |
| Aceituna Safari Deluxe | 6€ | Complimentary judgment |
| The Great Cheese Debate | 10€ | Tiny slice of goat cheese and a mini identity crisis |
| Express Aesthetic Tour | 5€ | Polaroid of you in front of jars |
| 🍊 Juice Machine Encounter | 2€ | Includes nothing but hope |
| 🥖 Bread Blessing Ceremony | Free | You pay the bread, I pay the vibe |
VIP Mercadona Crawl (All 4 Core Tours + juice & bread + post-tour voice note from Delia recapping your growth as a shopper): 20€
NOTE: Tour prices do not include in-store purchases!
📅 Upcoming Dates
August 3 – Málaga (Mercadona, Calle Hilera)
August 10 – Sevilla (Mercadona, near the orange juice machine that always breaks)
August 17 – Valencia (Supermercado y Therapy Session)
Spots fill fast. Like, faster than the fresh bread section at 6PM. Don’t wait.
✨ Book Now Below
(fake button for blog aesthetic only—serious inquiries, please yell “¡Delia, espera!” in a Mercadona near you)
